We Have Decided to Divorce - Now What?

Once two people have decided to end their marriage, they must make decisions surrounding the divorce. They may have already decided how to split the proceeds of the marriage either unofficially themselves or officially through a prenuptial agreement. The divorce process may be simple in that a lawyer may only be consulted to draft the necessary Dissolution of Marriage papers.

 

More importantly, though, when a couple divorces, whether or not children are involved will be the major issue. Couples who have children together will need to discuss child custody, visitation, where the children will live in a joint custody setting, finances for the custodial parent, and the children's futures. In a situation where the parents are at odds with each other and disagree as to the best interests of the children, then the lawyers will help mediate and if necessary, the couple will go to court.

Each person will need to find a lawyer once the divorce is inevitable. Even if one person has not agreed to the divorce, the other will consult a lawyer in order to serve the necessary papers on his/her spouse. Before consulting the lawyer and especially in situations where each party has not agreed to a settlement, it will be necessary for both sides to obtain and gather relevant financial documents such as income tax returns, total monthly expenses, income of the working parties, and day-to-day living costs.

 

Some lawyers recommend making a list of not only the hard assets but also any major items within the household that may be in question when everything is split. Debt of the couple will be an issue as well. What debt was brought into the marriage and what debt is considered "marital debt"? Some specialists go as far as advising couples to pay off marital debt before the divorce as this is difficult to deal with when negotiating.

Spouses that have poor credit histories should try to ameliorate their situations before the divorce so that options are available afterward. In addition, those that do not have credit cards in their own names should apply before the divorce and have things in place. Likewise, credit cards in the other spouse's name should be terminated if one person alone was responsible for the card.

Everything should be tallied in the case of the children's living expenses. Not only food, shelter and clothing but also membership dues for team participation and school costs. Assess your own earning potential and work availability. If the children will live with you and you are out of town regularly with your job, how will you manage? If you know you are filing for divorce, try to save a little extra money for emergency expenses and the lawyer's fee.

If both have agreed together to divorce, decide whether the process will be amicable or whether a bitter fight is more likely. The more that can be planned in advance, the cheaper it will be in terms of lawyers' costs and the easier it will be on all parties to complete the process and move on.